"Finding my beauty after abuse"

Heavy topics aren't easy right?! This one is for all the beautiful women who have been abused may you realize that as I share bits and pieces of my own story you'll find your own voice.

Jail wasn't fun that night, it was my first experience getting handcuffed and behind bars. It was the longest night of my life. Yeah I slapped him, but that night I wish I would've punched him. Funny now as I say that, but for years I thought I hated myself and hated the anger I carried for the abuse.

Backtrack, 5, 10, 15 years.... abuse started early, I saw my dad drink his sorrows away. My first experiences with abuse. Years later to have a perpetrator touch me inappropriately, more abuse. Then 21 I began to drink to not feel abused, because of the verbal abuse from my ex-husband. Then I ended up at the gym weight lifting heavy amounts of weights and abusing my body by lifting too much...

What am I rambling about?! Abuse... it comes in different forms and begins to shape us differently. I will only speak for myself, but after enduring abuse of different forms I began to self destruct. I became my own abuser. Of course there is a lot I am not saying, as it's too much to fit into a blog. But most important is that the abuse can be conquered and healed. I know I am being brief about this, because it can get very deep. If I started this blog it's because I want to encourage and not focus on all the negative effects of abuse. The list can vary for each person. I feel it's important to talk about it though as many suffer from being abused and continue to self-destruct.

It's important to know that the abuse can make you feel angry, hurt, confused, bitter, in raged and make you think you are going crazy.

It's necessary to know that processing these emotions are normal for the healing process.

Ways I found how to heal. Feel free to add to my list.

Heal Thyself

-Getting counseling

-Finding support groups

-Educating yourself about abuse

-Finding a support system (strong friendships)

-Having God as your greatest supporter

-Meditation

-Alone time

-Reading

-Journaling

-Prayer time

I found that time doesn't heal wounds or abuse, but putting action into my healing did. I found out who I am during my time with God and my alone time. As I journaled I began to find me. The Lord wants you to heal and be happy. To find beauty again. And beauty within your journey.

The LORD is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit. Psalms 34:18

May this week's reading help those that need to heal from abuse. Prayers, and blessings. XO Angie